Photo Credit: Charlotte Astrid
Today we are focussed on helping someone with depression.
Depression is an all-consuming condition. Sufferers of depression can wholeheartedly view life as pointless, and interpret themselves as unworthy of help and love. These negative thoughts can manifest physically, leading to exhaustion, insomnia and other conditions.
Helping someone with depression is an important but complicated task.
Give the below points a thought before jumping into the deep end.
Is your loved one depressed?
While no one but a doctor can positively diagnose depression, the below symptoms are often experienced by sufferers:
- Withdrawal from social events and other activities
- Disintegration of personal care
- General appearance of being unhappy
- Increased difficulty concentrating
- Insomnia or excessive sleeping
- Over-eating or loss of appetite
Open a dialogue
The most essential step in helping someone with depression is opening a dialogue. This can be easier said than done – your loved one may be reluctant to acknowledge their feelings and resist communication. Don’t interrogate your loved one or make them feel like they are under attack. Instead, let them know that you are worried about them and want to help.
During this conversation, it is also wise to discuss proactive ways to combat depression. Offer to drive your loved one to see a counsellor or to help them read through some information from the internet. Helping someone with depression is made easier when you agree upon a step forward. It will give you something to follow up and let your loved one know that this isn’t forever.
Listen
When helping someone with depression, don’t try to talk them out of their feelings or tell them that they are being irrational. Depression increases a person’s susceptibility to nit-pick the negative out of any situation. To a person who is depressed, the concerns they are feeling are completely real. Instead of telling them to cheer up, frame any approach as an offer of assistance – “I can see that you are unhappy, is there any way I can make you feel better?”. This alignment will remind your loved one that they are not alone.
Keep up the connection
Once you have started helping someone with depression, it is important to keep up consistent contact. This doesn’t mean you need to commit to a three hour heart-to-heart every day, nor does every conversation need to be about how they are feeling. Instead, send them a cute picture, text them a joke or call them to recommend a movie. This regular, casual contact will assure your loved one that they are not fighting depression alone.
Don’t take the symptoms of depression personally
When you are close to a person with depression, you can potentially become their punching bag. If they are experiencing feelings of sadness or anger that they cannot explain, they may take them out on you. While this can be hard to bear, remember that any criticisms that your loved one levels your way is likely to stem from their illness, rather than animosity toward you personally.
Take care of yourself
Helping someone with depression can cause you to experience higher stress levels yourself. As such, it is vital that you allocate time to do the things that you love: to find enjoyment and recharge your batteries. Don’t stop living your life out of a sense of obligation to the other person.You may also need to speak to other friends or family members about how you are feeling – taking on another person’s emotional burdens can leave you feeling weighed down.
